Imaginary Therapy

Television, print and online media reverberated with reports about the attack. Everyone was shocked that chimpanzees could do so much damage to a human being, especially without being provoked. Animal trainers and zookeepers stressed that all adult chimps, no matter how tame they seem, are unpredictable and dangerous. Nobody, however, could recall hearing about an attack that was as vicious as this one. Unfortunately, some internet postings said that Moe was the attacker. When Moe contacted me, St. James was still in very critical condition.

“I don’t think St. James is going to visit me for a long time. I don’t think he’ll want to,” Moe said.
“I just hope he survives,” I replied. “LaDonna is watching over him in the hospital. How are you doing?”
“I just want to sleep.”
“The news reports said it happened right in front of you.”
“The whole thing was all my fault.”
“You may feel like that, but...”
It was the first time I heard Moe raise his voice. “Buddy and Ollie didn’t hate St. James and LaDonna. They hated me.”
Animal behaviorists thought that the chimps might have attacked because they were jealous of all the attention Moe was getting from the Davis’. With the birthday cake and celebration, Buddy and Ollie may have felt they weren’t being treated fairly.
“They were jealous of you?” I asked.
“Not at all. Just the opposite. Buddy and Ollie didn’t want their attention. They hated me because I loved to be visited by St. James and LaDonna.”
“I don’t understand,” I said.
“When I got here, I tried to be friends with the other chimps. I told them my whole life story. I thought since we all had been in the entertainment business, they’d understand how I felt about the Davis’.”
“And they didn’t?”
“Ollie and Buddy said I was spoiled. They told me I should be like them.”
“How so?”
“All their life, they lived in cages with other chimps. They thought it was disgusting that I cared about two humans.”
“Okay, so you were different,” I remarked.
“For months, they tried to convince me they were right. I kept telling them I could be a friend to humans and to chimps. They grew more and more angry with me.”
“So what happened?”
“A few weeks ago, they said I had to make LaDonna and St. James go away.”
“Or?”
“Or they were going to do it for me, for my own good.”
“So when they saw the Davis’ coming for your birthday, they knew you still hadn’t listened to them,” I said.
“That’s part of the reason it was my fault. I should have done what they told me. And I should never have told them my story.”
“Did you know what they were going to do next?”
“No. I think the girls, Suzie and Bones, knew what was going to happen. That’s why they ran away. I thought Buddy and Ollie were just going to scare St. James and LaDonna. I tried to warn them, but there was no time.”
“And then the whole thing happened in front of you.”
“That’s why I just want to sleep. During the attack, I knew they were making me remember what humans had done to my chimpanzee mother. They were recreating my story. That’s why they went after LaDonna first. When St. James protected her, they attacked him.”

“Humans tore apart your chimpanzee mother and then chimpanzees tore apart your human father. Where does that leave you, Moe?” I asked.
“Right here at Animal Haven Ranch. I still don’t know who I am, or what I want to be. But I know I’m not like Buddy or Ollie. I could never be that vicious.”
“That’s important,” I said.
“I know that about myself. But you can never be sure of that. You don’t know what somebody else might do.”
I had to agree with him.
“It’s a chimp thing,” he said.
“It’s a human thing, too,” Moe told me.